Bullying and the Hierarchy of Needs
The first time I heard about Maslow was an Introduction to Psychology class back in 1986. My early days of education (life really) were filled with wide-eyed optimism and just a curiosity for all things psychology. While I was a psych teacher over the past few years, Maslow was always a fun chapter to teach. However, I didn’t make it a substantial theoretical grounding supporting my dissertation and I think I may have missed something because of that choice. A website of my own allows me to tread into those untouched waters without being grilled by a dissertation committee and just toss my thoughts into the hat in regards to bullying and Maslow.
A brief and cursory review of Maslow’s theory called, the Hierarchy of Needs. He believes that certain motives drive us to act and they are considered, for the most part, to be hierarchical; needs being “hierarchical” means that you don’t move on to the next higher level without first meeting the need prior to it. You know, video games – can’t move to the next level without successfully, even modestly like one star out of three, completing the level before it.
Courtesy: simplypsychology.org
The pursuit begins with basic physiological needs: food, water, sleep and such. When these are met, you can seek and find security and safety – this can mean shelter, or numbers. But they are related in that they are both basic needs. Next, you can begin to build relationships and a sense of belonging. If you are struggling to eat or feel unsafe, you can’t trust and you can’t build trusting relationships with other people. Self-concept is how you feel about yourself; self-esteem is what you think others feel about you. This is apparent in the next level – if you are in a trusting relationship, you think you are liked by that other person. And you can see how this is the first psychological need to meet. Finally, with positive relationships, basic physiological needs met and achieving your goals in life – you are self-actualized.
This is a dynamic theory. It isn’t a sprint, it’s a marathon and there will be ebbs and tides in your movement between the levels. For example, Steve Jobs had everything. Basic needs were met, a sense of belonging and purpose with positive relationships (I would imagine since I didn’t know him), positive self- esteem with great accomplishments and probably had attained a high level of self-actualization. I’d also imagine with innovators and leaders like Jobs, self-actualization was a moveable measure, not a finish line tape. Anyway, the point is, when he became ill – the very floor of the hierarchy of needs was threatened and Jobs walked away from all of it (for the most part). When the basic needs aren’t being met, the rest of the pyramid collapses. It’s been supported through evidence time and again. Think about your own life, when you are sick, how easy is it to go out and foster positive relationships? It’s hard and they can suffer – Maslow exemplified.
Please email or include a comment if you have any questions or suggestions/additions to my explanation. But let’s take a look at how this theory might contribute to understanding bullying. It begins with the very basic of needs.
Maslow believed that the pursuit of meeting these needs led to motivation. Recently, my wife, Sara, got me into a specialist on leadership named, Simon Sinek. In his book, Start with Why, he talks about the Golden Circle. This Golden Circle identifies motivation from the outside, “What” you do, to “How” you do it and finally, “Why” you do something. Most people move from the outside in – I make doodads [what] by gathering finances and building them in my factory [how]. Sinek believes that the most long term success stories {he uses Apple, Inc. as his example} have a clear vision and focus on the why one would produce doodads. He suggests that the why is rarely, “to make money.” However, the Why is the true driver of the company. It is the motivator that a successful business shares with the customer or constructs into a mission statement or reviews when things get hard. The question for me becomes what need is the bully using as motivator, or, the “why.” Is it the need for food? The need for safety and security? The need for a sense of belonging? Or the need for self-actualization? Let’s explore the possible connection[s]. Keep in mind, I haven’t yet read any large scale survey accurately identifying two key factors in the bully identity: [1] How does a bully define bullying? [2] Why do they bully?
Basic physiological needs aren’t really in the picture of bullying….or is it? Targets often cite the taking of their lunch or their lunch money as the reason they are routinely picked on by the bully. Remember, bullying isn’t a one- time act – it is repeated over time. So is the drive for food a reason for bullying? I haven’t read any study that asks “bullies” why they behave the way they do. That might be an interesting study….hmmm….for now though, let’s give the bully the benefit of the doubt and say that meeting basic physiological needs is the motivation. If we, as a society, can ensure the basics for children and their families, we can head off this motivation for peer victimization. Unfortunately, the current tax plan may put that resource in peril and we may see an uptick in violence at a younger age.
The need for safety and security is almost certainly a driving force. Bullies are often being bullied elsewhere, at home, at school, in the neighborhood, and so on. In a previous post, I talked about the lack of power and control and the evolution of a bully. When a person feels a lack of power or control in her life, she may search for it in other places. He lacks a sense of safety and security and tries to get it on their own. This can lead to bullying. So can Maslow offer an explanation for the creation of a bully? From this level of the hierarchy? Sure. The individual may have food in their belly but they don’t feel safe and secure because of violence at home or because a parent or parents are absent or no support, this can lead to bullying behavior in the pursuit of safety. Again, a society that wants to commit to a comprehensive approach to peer violence will ensure food and shelter security for families.
It is rare for a bully to say that he or she victimizes others because it gives them a sense of belonging. But I can imagine a scenario where being perceived as powerful or popular and in control of his environment would make an individual more popular [or feared]. In fact, recent small scale studies I have read suggest that it does give the bully a sense of belonging because they feel on top of the heap and paid attention to in school or on the playground. How can we ensure that children feel a sense of belonging? Make schools a hub in the community again. In our own school we have what is called the SUN program for low income children but that program is limited in scope because of a lack of money and resources. My son wants to go but doesn’t qualify. In my own work experience, I was a paraprofessional in a before and after school program that parents paid for and was subsidized for low income families. That Extended Student Services program was at every school of the district. I wasn’t aware of the bullying phenomena then so I can’t tell you if having those programs there helped. But I am sure it didn’t hurt. What I know from research is that children who feel disenfranchised or lack connection or a feeling of belonging will try and find it elsewhere. In the case of a bully, it may be that the pursuit involves victimizing others to be part of a, or THE, popular group. I have seen otherwise disconnected kids FEEL connected by being involved with bully events.
When you have your basic physiological needs met, you have a sense of security and a sense of belonging, Maslow believes you will have a positive sense of self. It makes sense really, when things are going your way you feel good about everything. The stereotype of the bully is that they have low self-esteem. Even from the psychological definition, this perception doesn’t make sense. The deference, popularity and obedience they receive by themselves would contribute to a positive sense of self in a child. If they don’t, the bully’s perception of the deference and obedience they receive would contribute to their positive sense of self. In other words, if I think people are being nice to me because they like me [when in reality they might fear me], I would see that as a good thing and feel good about myself. The thinking, perception and interpretation by humans is spectacular! What it can do though, is put a band aid over a wound caused by a bully, or parent(s) or bully sibling. The bully might feel bad about themselves because they are bullied and victimizing someone else might be a way to cover up the shame of being a victim. Well we can prevent this by not bullying our children and giving them power and control and crucial times in their cognitive development (see, “Power, control and bullying”).
Children (and eventually adults) who bully often have something they are missing and they victimize others as a result. That is why, in my opinion, we need to be more compassionate toward bullies. They need help and support, not expulsion and revulsion. I know, it is hard to swallow that sentiment but it is true. With a piece missing, it is unlikely a bully reaches self-actualization because one of the previous levels of the hierarchy are weak or altogether missing. In this paradigm of healing though, self-actualization is the goal for all children [people really]. But we reach that level by helping the bully [and the target…and the bystanders….and the school…..and the community….and the family….as Olweus wrote, it is either a comprehensive approach or it will fall short.
In conclusion, I really like this idea of taking theories of psychological development and applying them to bullying/peer victimization. I will do some more of these but this came up because I was reading Sinek’s theory of leadership he refers to as “The Golden Circle” in his book, Start with Why. I think it also lends to the legitimacy and public health risk status of bullying when one can take almost ANY theory of human development and apply it to the phenomena of bullying. It means that it is deeply ingrained in us (or I am just very good at applying theory to action). Regardless, ending and preventing bullying/peer victimization takes a comprehensive effort and won’t be dealt with effectively if we try to approach it piecemeal. But I think it is possible.